Amakimbirane ni imwe mu ntwaro kirimbuzi Satani akunze kwifashisha mu gusenya ingo. Icyakora haracyari ibyiringiro ku bafite ingo zitubakitse neza uyu munsi ko hari icyo Imana yabakorera ibintu bigasubira mu buryo.
Nkuko umuvugabutumwa, Ev. Adda Darlen Kiyange ukorera umurimo w'Imana muri ADEPR Paruwase ya Kicukiro, unasanzwe akora ivugabutumwa kuri Agakiza.org no muri minisiteri y'ivugabutumwa Seek and Save Humanities Ministry( SSHM), yigishije ku ngingo y'amakimbirane mu bashaknye, yagaragaje ibintu bitanu bikurura ayo makimbirane.
Muri iyi nyigisho birashoboka ko harimo igisubizo ku miryango iri mu maremera, mu gihe habaye kwisubiraho ku bashakanye. Ku batararushinga bagitegereje cyangwa abenda kurushinga, ni ingenzi cyane kuzirinda ibi bintu mu ngo zabo kuko aribyo bitera amakimbirane, amakimbirane akavamo ubutane , ubutane bukabyara kuzima k'umuryango . Ibyo bikabyara umusaruro mubi, insinzi kuri Satani yo kuburizamo umugambi w'Imana:
Kudashyikirana (Communication)
Byanze bikunze mu rugo ntabwo ibintu bihora bimeze neza. Hari ubwo rero abashakanye umwe muri bo ahitamo guceceka kandi nyamara ibyo bintu iyo biza kuganirwaho na bombi wenda byari no gukemuka. Ariko kuko hatabayeho kuganira amakimbirane akaba abonye aho kwinjirira bikaba byasenya umuryango.
Kuri wowe utararushinga nugera mu rwawe, uzakore ibishoboka byose kugira ngo imishyikirano ihore imeze neza. Nta gucecekana mugenzi wawe kuko birasenya. Nuzabona hajemo guceceka, uzajye ushaka ukuntu aho hantu muhava vuba mukomeza ubuzima busanzwe.
Imicungire y'umutungo
Umutungo ni ingingo ikomeye cyane ikurura amakimbirano mu rugo, iyo hatabayeho kubwizanya ukuri. Abagabo benshi ntibereka abagore babo umutungo. Hari na bamwe bawerekana ariko umugore ntabe yakoraho. Ibyiza ni uguhana amakuru no gusangira byose. Hari abagore basesagura bikazana ibibazo kugeza ubwo umutungo bawuhishwa. Ariko birakwiye ko bombi bagira ubwenge bwo gucunga neza umutungo kandi ntibahishanye ama konti yabo ( Bank accounts). Ni byiza ko amazina yanyu mwembi aboneka kuri buri konti mufite. Nibyo bica amakimbirane kuri iyi ngingo igendanye n'umutungo.
Imiryango ishobora kubateranya
Abo mu muryango bemerewe guhabwa inkunga zitandukanye ariko badateranya, badasebanya kandi badategeka. Si byiza kubaha uburenganzira burenze. Ibyo bakorerwa umugabo n'umugore babyumvikanaho. Si byiza gufata neza abiwanyu ab'iwabo ukabamerera nabi. Bizana ubusharire. Ni iby'agaciro kubizirikana.
Kubyara no kurera
Ni byiza kuganira no kugerageza kumvikana ku bijyanye n'urubyaro. Kirazira gushinga ijosi ukanga kwakira ibitekerezo bya mugenzi wawe. Niba habayeho gutinda kubyara mubigendanemo neza umwe nagira ati" tujye kwa muganga" uti' ndabyanze'. Niba mwabyaye mufatanye no muri byose. Umwe ntarare ahagaze undi yisinziriye . Mwumvikane uburyo bwo guhana umwana, kumucyaha.
Umugore ntakwiye guhera mu bana ngo yibagirwe umukunzi we bashakanye (cheri). Bizana amakimbirane . Ni byiza kumenya ko abana b'abahungu bakunda ba nyina cyane, abakobwa bagakunda ba se cyane. Nubwo ibyo bisa n'ibitangaje , ariko nabyo ntibigomba kurenzwa ingohe. Ntibyagakwiye kuba intandaro y'amakimbirane ngo wibaze uti uriya mukobwa na se bimeze bite cyangwa uriya mu hungu na nyina?
Akazi no kwiga
Muri iki gihe isi ikataje mu itrambere bisaba kugendana n'ikerekezo cyayo, ikiguzi cy'umwanya kiri hejuru. Mukwirinda amakimbirane, bisaba ko abashakanye bashyira buri kintu cyose mu mwanya wacyo. Ntagutakaza igihe niyo cyaba umunota.
Abashakanye baba bakwiye gukangurirwa Gutahira ku gihe . Kwiga n'akazi bishobora kuba urwitwazo rwo kutaboneka mu rugo, nyamara bikurura amakimbirane. Ugomba gutanga ikiguzi cyose byagusaba kugira ngo ube mu rugo, kandi n'ibyo ntubireke.
Imfunguzo 6 zifasha mu gukemura amakimbirane y'abashakanye
Ubusanzwe kugirana amakimbirane cyangwa se kutumva ibintu kimwe ku bashakanye ni ibisanzwe. Ariko uburyo bwo gukemura ayo makimbirane buratandukanye kuko buri muryango wifatira ingamba zawo mu kwikemurira amakimbirane.
Umuhanga mu mitekerereze (philosophe) witwa Bignicourt yaravuze ati 'amakimbirane yose atakemuwe neza ateza ikibazo kimara imyaka myinshi cyane'
Ni iby'ingenzi cyane kwiga uburyo bwiza bwo gukemura amakimbirane hagati y'abashakanye ariko uko abantu bagenda biga, bazarushaho gusobanukirwa uburyo bukwiriye bwabafasha kubana mu mahoro. Dore uburyo 6 buzadufasha gukemura amakimbirane:
Kongera kumenya ko hari ikibazo: aha bishatse kuvuga ko abantu bakwiye kumenya, kwiyibutsa byimbitse ko hari ibitagenda neza.
Kwiga no kumenya neza umuzi w'ikibazo: ubushakashatsi bwagaragaje ko bikomeye kugirango abashakanye baganire neza ku cyateje ikibazo nyirizina ahubwo usanga babica ku ruhande bakaganira kubishamikiyeho aribyo bisa nko komora igikomere ugica hejuru.
Ibi bituma ikiganiro kitagenda neza ndetse n'umwanzuro nyawo ntupfa kuboneka kuko ikiganiro ntikiba gishingiye ku ngingo nyamukuru.
Gufata iya mbere mu gukemura amakimbirane waba ari wowe wahemukiye mugenzi wawe cyangwa se atari wowe ikintu cy'ingenzi ni uko uba uwambere mu gukemura amakimbirane ari hagati yanyu nk'abashakanye.
'nuko nujyana ituro ryawe ku gicaniro, ukahibukira mwene so ko afite icyo mupfa, usige ituro ryawe imbere y'igicaniro ubanze ugende, ubanze ugende wikiranure na mwene so uhereko ugaruke uture ituro ryawe' ( Matayo 5: 23-24)
Kurasa ku kibazo aho kureba ku muntu: ikibazo gikomeye kiba mu gihe cyo gukemura amakimbirane hagati y'abashakanye ni uko usanga umwe ashinja mugenzi we ko ariwe ntandaro y'ikibazo mbese bitana bamwana ugasanga ikibazo ubwacyo ntikivugwaho ahubwo umwe arashinja mugenzi we ko ariwe munyamafuti, ibi si byiza ahubwo hakwiye kuvugwa ikibazo nyirizina.
Gushaka igisubizo: aha ikiganiro kigomba kuba cyagenze neza hagati y'abashakanye bamaze kumenya neza ikibazo, icyagiteye hagakurikiraho kugishakira umuti ndetse no kukirandurana n'imizi.
Gushaka amahoro aho gushaka insinzi: mu makimbirane ntihakwiye kubaho utsinze n'utsinzwe, ahubwo hagomba kuba abatsinzwe cyangwa abatsinze. Iyo umwe ashaka insinzi ntaba agifitiye mugenzi we urukundo ndetse bibangamira abana babo kandi bose ari umubiri umwe.
Muri macye amakimbirane arasanzwe ariko uburyo bwo kuyakemura nibwo butandukanye ariko abashakanye ntibakwiye guheranwa n'ibibazo. Mu rwandiko Pawulo yandikiye abaroma yaragize ati: niba bishoboka ku rwanyu ruhande mubane amahoro n'abantu bose.
Source: www.topchretien.com
Soma izindi nkuru zifitanye isano no gukemura amakimbirane yo mu ngo
https://agakiza.org/new_web/Gukemura-amakimbirane-mu-bubatse-ingo-igice-cya-mbere.html
https://agakiza.org/new_web/Uburyo-bwiza-bwo-gukemura-amakimbirane-mu-bubatse-ingo-igice-cya-2.html
Ibintu 9 byadufasha gukemura ibibazo hagati y'Abashakanye // Pastor Desire H.
Source : https://agakiza.org/Uzagira-urugo-ruzira-amakimbirane-niwirinda-ibi-bintu.html
